Sharing Big News with the World

I got a job!

Thankfully this is not a strange occurence, what is strange occurence is that for the first time I shared this with the world in an announcement on social media.  I have been on facebook for the past 13 years, I have had five jobs, have graduated 3 schools (am anticipating my fourth), and this is the first time that I have shared momentous big news in this medium.

When I signed my contract I said "Can we take a pic?  I need to use this for my digital media project."  Without this class I wouldn't have thought to commemorate that moment, and quite honestly I'm really grateful that I did.  It is a big deal in my story to be finishing my theological education and be moving right in to my first call.  The post was cute and the support of the community has been lovely.  But all the attention actually did remind me of why I stay away from posting big news on social media.  I do like flying under the radar.  As I continue down this path I don't think I will share all significant posts on social media.  My inclination to be private is still very strong but I did learn something in all this that has moved me to reconsider how stingy I am with posts of this nature.

I spent this last weekend with college friends who have known me a long time.  I think most of them are theists, largely of the Christian variety, but they never go to church and frankly don't even consider going usually.  This weekend I learned that my posting about my new job piqued some curiosity.  A couple of my friends even mentioned looking up the word Curate and we had a short discussion about what my job entails.  This surprised me to learn that my post inspired some of my friends to learn about the church when I wasn't present, usually if I'm around we'll have a church or God talk, but because of my post that was happening without me!  What has been said in this class is true, your posts can be a way to educate, intrique and motivate people to do things that they ordinarily wouldn't consider.  This always seemed like something that would require a lot of extra work on my part, but this happened just by me sharing the going-ons of my life.  As a clergy person I suspect moments like this happen regularly, where our lives are considered "different" by designation and so they provide opportunities to reflect and learn by either the similarities and/or the contrast to non-clergy life.  This is a great tool for evangelism and teaching and my prayer is that I will continue to be bold and embrace it.  In fact, I will pray that prayer in all areas of my life.  Amen.  

Being Pastoral in The Digital Realm

Right around the time of my great digital outrage about Baltimore and the myriad of social ills that plague us, I got two new friend requests... Parishioners at my new congregation (remember that rich congregation I was telling you about?!)  I waited a day to accept either friend request, they are the first of their kind and I didn't rush to accept them in order to process this momentous change from my facebook page being primarily a place where my friends and acquaintances peaked into my life, to a place where parishioners would encounter their future clergy person.  Yeah.... there was a lot of trepidation, but I knew there was no other way around it, I would have to accept their friend request or be seriously rude.  So I clicked the accept button and officially kissed my old facebook self good bye.  I knew conceptually that that person was already gone and my page already reflected that, but this time it felt more significant, more final become of my upcoming job and ordination.

The timing has also made this friend acceptance a little more dramatic.   I still have status updates about Baltimore that some would find controversial, but honestly, they are for me non-negotiable.  To delete them would make me hate myself.

To be true to myself and still be pastoral, that is the challenge.  (Shocker, I'm not always the most pastoral person, plus I'm new to this!)  It occurred to me that if I was going to potentially be inflamatory, I should also be conciliatory with an eye toward being pastoral and sensitive to those who disagree with me.  I didn't want to water down my message, but I knew I needed to make a gesture that said I am open for dialogue and point back to the power of God in all this.  To that end I went to our Book of Common Prayer - the "place" where we all meet and gather round.  I knew there was a relatively simple thing to do that would make the point I was keen to make - share one of our collects on my page, and that is exactly what I did.  I shared the Collect for Social Justice which was totally fitting and reflected an authentic prayer for our situation.

That this was a wise action to take was soon made apparent as both of my parishioner facebook friends liked this post!  As much as I would like to think of myself as a renegade who doesn't care what people think of me, I have to admit that I was relieved that they liked this post.  It suggested to me that there is a way forward where I can still share my opinions (for the most part) and still find common ground with the people I am called to serve at this time and place.  In all this I realized that I am not called to be right, I am called to be outspoken about what is right, but that is different.  In all things the point is to share a message in a way that can be heard.  That's the whole point of this course this semester!  No one can hear a message if they are resentful or forced to feel guilty, and so it is my job to remember to speak in a way people can listen and learn.  Now to remember this lesson for the rest of my career.  Oh man, Jesus take the wheel!

Self-Regulation - The Name of the Game

I had to delete a post today.  This was the first time ever.  It is a notable moment in the short timeline of this project.

It was something provocative, I knew it would be.  It was an image of the "Egyptian Revolution" juxtaposed with an image from the "Baltimore Riots."  They were essentially the same photo and I was hoping to play on media portrayal and the power of words to distort or inspire something.  It had the word shit in it... and the person who wrote the post devolved into some bull-ish language.  It was not ideal but the sentiment was spot on so I posted it because of trying to be authentic to myself and to messages that I think are important..

I took it down a day later not because I disagree with the message, I took it down because I was just hired as a Curate to a very rich, White church and I was afraid that they would be so utterly offended that they would rethink their decision.

Now, I'm in a weird place that I have never been in before because I have not had an online presence.  I want to be authentic to myself, but I am fearful because the community I have been called to serve is way more conservative than me.  I do feel called to this place, they are great people, do great work and are hungry to know more about God.  I know that we're going to learn a lot from each other.  I am still measured with the congregation as I suspect I always will be with them.  I'm from a different world and I know not to expect the radical liberalism that I am frankly more comfortable with and so  in person and preaching I have yet to push them too hard - but push I have and they have been receptive!   Even so, I am worried about compromising my beliefs and passion too much.

I don't really know how much is too much of either compromise or activism.  I don't want to be benign or have a vanilla online persona.  That is unhelpful and riddled with pitfalls too - being inauthentic and irrelevant the biggest two I can think of.  This feels uncomfortable and frightening and I just pray and hope I don't screw this up.

... This is one of those days that I am wishing that my project was something along the lines of creating an online how-to video of "Braiding for Jesus."

First Hiccup.

2 Posting things about my life on the internet has always unnerved me.  There's so many things to consider and rather than consider these things, I've liked to just be a social media voyeur.  For me it's been safer, easier and still entertaining.  

It turns out that my fears had some basis.  Early on in this project as I was trying to get myself kickstarted into posting things on social media  I posted a picture commenting on this ordination journey. There were numerous intentions behind this post and I was trying to efficient with my time.  To really make this social media platform work for me.  

My intentions behind this post were:

1. To thank the church community that has sponsored me in the process but that I do not get to see much. 

2. To take a risk and share something of my journey - the whole point of this assignment and lastly, 

3. To do my homework and actually do the work of this project by actually posting on social media.

Simple right?  Wrong!!

The concerns that I have had surrounding authentic posts being twisted actually materialized.  I got two messages from family members who were a bit upset and confused that they had not heard anything first before it was posted on facebook.  I know that's silly and I should be happy that people care and love me enough to want to be involved in my life, but the truth is I actually had nothing serious to share, and now I was in a position to feel uncomfortably defensive about nothing!  My first thought when I read the text message that began with "well missy..." was this is why I don't post things! 

I know there is an etiquette to social media, but I hadn't crossed any bounds and yet I was still getting some heat.  I guess this is par for the course.  People interpret and read into postings and it is naive to think that they will all be understood and embraced.  Having an online persona requires patience and a little bit of thick skin.  I will continue to work on fostering both as my online career continues to take root and grow...

I can't lie though, it was a lot easier when I never posted anything!!

Last one in is a rotten egg!

Becoming a contributing member of my internet community has been a lot harder than I imagined it would be and this whole project has been harder to kickstart than I expected.  The reasons for such I would like to provide in list form.*  

TOP 5 REASONS “JOINING” THE INTERNET IS HARD.

1.       Jet Lag is real and Holy Week is not for the faint of heart.  I had intended and agreed to start posting information the first week back from Spring Break.  I got home Holy Wednesday from Istanbul and then it was a mad dash to keep up with the Holy Week Liturgies and for some reason that for me requires full focus.  On Good Friday I took pictures of the cross and sanctuary during the Tenebrae service intending to share on Instagram.  My phone still has the pictures, but I forgot mid project that I was posting.  It was not a conscious decision, I literally forgot the pictures were there and that I had had a plan for them.  The big take away that week – I do not have a posting instinct at all.

2.       The Oppressive Pressure to be Clever and/or Witty.  I want all my posts to be worth someone’s time and often I can’t think of anything particularly interesting or hilarious to share – so I won’t want to… and then I don’t.  I want my internet persona to be like the cool girl in the cafeteria – down to earth and funny; only speaks when she has something to say and in between sips of chocolate milk. Oh the pressure!!!

3.       I don’t want people in my business.  I am a pretty private person and I don’t want the randoms in my life to know what is going on.  That is a pretty self-absorbed reason I know, but it’s still true.

4.       I am forgetful.  I get myself already to make a posting, I take pictures in preparation to post… and then the squirrel effect happens.  Something happens in the moment and I get completely distracted and forgot that I was in the middle of posting something; then by the time I return to my posting the moment has passed and I think that the posting is no longer timely or clever… two things that are essential for something to be a good post in my opinion.

5.       It is a place to voice serious concerns and yet I don’t know if I have the time or energy to engage responsibly in that way.  I know its irresponsible to just take random stands on facebook and just walk away.  The internet is useful for education, not just riling people up and I want to make sure to do both but responsibly and I question whether I have the emotional energy for that right now.

*I have written this in list format for two reasons. 1.) I love reading internet lists; and 2.) When I was researching the best naming strategies for blogs, they suggested that blogs that list things or teach things get the most traction.  This post doesn’t teach… but it lists.